EDS

It's 31 October 2009.

It's the last calendar day of Electronic Data System or EDS. Tomorrow it will be Hewlett Packard Enterprise Services.

A new dawn awaits. A new beginning. A new regime. A new nightmare.

Wave 3 takes effect on 1 Nov, 2009. Half the world's nations including the US of A will swing into effect. The single largest IT merger ever to chronicle in history of the world takes place on the stroke of midnight.

Here, I've no idea what waits us or what's going
 to greet us, eat us or douse us.

The fact remains : Work as Usual.

Wunderbar.

Booze....Bottoms Up...

WARNING : DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU'RE AGAINST THE CONSUMPTION OF ALCOHOL


DCSL EXTRA SPECIAL : protects your heart / prevents constipation / blocks diarrhea / improves lung capacity / cushions joints
WHITE DIAMOND : combats cancer / controls blood pressure / saves your eyesight / shields against Alzheimer's / slows aging process
BLUE LABEL : aids digestion / lowers cholesterol / protects your heart / stabilizes blood sugar / guards against liver disease
DOUBLE DISTILLED : battles diabetes / lowers cholesterol / helps stops strokes / controls blood pressure / smoothes skin
OLD RESERVE : protects your heart / quiets cough / strengthens bones / controls blood pressure / blocks diarrhea
RITZ : prevents constipation / helps hemorrhoids / lowers cholesterol / combats cancer / stabilizes blood sugar
RICHORT : controls blood pressure / combats cancer / strengthens bones / protects your / heart aids weight loss
HANNEPIER : combats cancer / protects your heart / stabilizes blood sugar / boosts memory
prevents constipation
FRANKLIN : strengthens bones / saves eyesight / combats cancer / protects your heart /
controls blood pressure
VSO : combats cancer / prevents constipation / promotes weight loss / protects your heart /
helps hemorrhoids
GALLERY : saves eyesight / controls blood pressure / lowers cholesterol / combats cancer /
supports immune system
RED RUM : saves eyesight / protects your heart / prevents constipation / combats cancer /
promotes weight loss
DARK RUM : protects against prostate cancer / combats breast cancer / strengthens bones /
banishes bruises / guards against heart disease
HANSEN : protects your heart / combats cancer / ends insomnia / slows aging process / shields against Alzheimer's
BLACK WHITE : promotes weight loss / protects your heart / lowers cholesterol / combats cancer / controls blood pressure
RED LABEL : aids digestion / soothes sore throat / clears sinuses / combats cancer / boosts immune system
BLACK LABEL : promotes weight loss / helps stops strokes / lowers cholesterol / combats cancer / controls blood pressure
GOLD LABEL : protects your heart / boosts memory / protects your heart / combats cancer / supports immune system
CHIVAS REGAL : aids digestion / battles diabetes / protects your heart / improves mental health / boosts immune system
GRANTS : lowers cholesterol / controls blood pressure / combats cancer / kills bacteria / fights fungus
GREEN LABEL : protects against heart attacks / promotes weight loss / helps stops strokes /
combats prostate cancer / lowers cholesterol
REMUS MARTIN : saves eyesight / conquers kidney stones / combats cancer / enhances blood flow / protects your heart
V&A : combats cancer / protects your heart / helps stops strokes / promotes weight loss /
kills bacteria
NAPOLEON : heals wounds / aids digestion / guards against ulcers / increases energy /
fights allergies
MENDIS : combats cancer / protects your heart / controls blood pressure / smoothes skin /
stops scurvy
LEMON GIN : combats cancer / protects your heart / controls blood pressure / smoothes skin / stops scurvy
ORANGE GIN : combats cancer / boosts memory / regulates thyroid / aids digestion / Shields against Alzheimer's
WHITE GIN : controls blood pressure / lowers cholesterol / kills bacteria / combats cancer /
strengthens bones
DRY GIN : lowers cholesterol / combats cancer / battles diabetes / prevents constipation /
smoothes skin
CLASIC RUM : protects your heart / promotes weight loss / combats cancer / battles diabetes / smoothes skin
VODKA : reduce risk of heart attack / combats cancer / kills bacteria / lowers cholesterol / fights fungus
SMIRNOFF : supports immune systems / combats cancer / protects your heart /
straightens respiration

GALETINE : prevents constipation / combats cancer / helps stops strokes / aids digestion /
helps hemorrhoids
GOLD COIN : protects against heart disease / promotes weight loss / combats prostate cancer
lowers cholesterol / aggravates diverticulitis
BACARDI : strengthens bones / relieves colds / aids digestion / dissolves warts / blocks diarrhea
WHITE RUM : slows aging process / prevents constipation / boosts memory / lowers cholesterol / protects against heart disease
ILICITY ARACK : protects your heart / battles diabetes / conquers kidney stones / combats cancer / helps stops strokes
POT ARRACK : combats cancer / protects your heart

A Message from Narayan Murthy - Boss of InfoSys...

[ I've edited for easy read. Bosses do write crap at times. ]


It's 1/2 past 8PM. The lights are still on...PCs still running, coffee machines still buzzing...And who's at work? Most of them??? Most who?? Take a closer look...

Male specimens! Take a closer...again, all or most of them are bachelors...hahaha

And why are they sitting late? Working hard? No way!!!
Any guesses???

Let's ask one of them...
Here's what he said, "What's there 2 do after going home. Here we get to surf, AC, phone, food, coffee. That is why I am working late."

This is the scene in most research centers and software companies and other off-shore offices.

Bachelors 'Passing-Time' during late hours in the office just bcoz they say they've nothing else to do when at home. Now what are the consequences...

'Working' (for the record only) late hours soon becomes part of the institute or company culture.

With bosses more than eager to provide support to those 'working' late in the form of taxi vouchers, food vouchers and of course good feedback, (oh, he's a hard worker... goes home only to change..!!).
They aren't helping things too...

To hell with bosses who don't understand the difference between 'sitting' late and 'working' late!!!

Very soon, the boss start expecting all employees to put in extra working hours.

So, My dear Bachelors let me tell you, life changes when u get married and start having a family... office is no longer a priority, family is... and
That's when the problem starts... b'coz u start having commitments at home too.

For your boss, the earlier 'hardworking' guy suddenly seems to become a 'early leaver' even if u leave an hour after regular time... after doing the same amount of work.

People leaving on time after doing their tasks for the day are labelled as work-shirkers...

Girls who thankfully always (its changing nowadays... though) leave on time are labelled as 'not up to it'. All the while, the bachelors pat their own backs and carry on 'working' not realizing that they r spoiling the work culture at their own place and never realize that they would have to regret at one point of time.

So what's the moral of the story??
* Very clear, LEAVE ON TIME!!!
* Never put in extra time 'unless really needed'
* Don't stay back unnecessarily and spoil your company work culture which will in turn cause inconvenience to you and your colleagues.

There are hundred other things to do in the evening.

Learn music....[ from an ex-musician. I AGREE..u will see the world in a different light ]

Learn a foreign language...

Try a sport... TT, cricket...

Importantly, get a girl friend or boy friend, take him / her around town...

* And for heaven's sake, net cafe rates have dropped to an all-time low (plus, no fire-walls) and try cooking for a change.

Take a tip from the Smirnoff ad: * ' Life's calling, where are you?? ' *

Please pass on this message to all those colleagues and please do it before leaving time, don' t stay back till midnight to forward this!!!

IT'S A TYPICAL MENTALITY THAT WORKING FOR LONG HOURS MEANS VERY HARD WORKING & 100% COMMITMENT ETC.

PEOPLE WHO REGULARLY 'SIT LATE' IN THE OFFICE DON'T KNOW TO MANAGE THEIR TIME. SIMPLE !

Regards,
NARAYAN MURTHY.

Faces...

The night it was...

There was a time I used to be a guitarist in a band. (Psstt…I used the word 'used to’ – underline that before bombarding me with lyrical questions).

We played songs to the tunes of Bollywood, Hollywood and Jalan Harapanwood…yes that was where the band was ‘born.’

We’ve like a 100 piece band ….sometimes not knowing the guy at the other end playing the clarinet or where he came from or the lead guitarist looking like Jimi Hendricks minus the slicks.

Then there was me, a novice learning to play the elementary version of a guitar but landed playing a three-pick-up Fender red/white slicker. I must've looked like a lamppost then.

Anyway…my first gig, I remmy that well. We played at a wedding reception for a notorious thug in a place called Kampong Selut in Prai.

As we got to setting up our equipment, the whole bloody kampong folks including the grandfathers and grandmothers came out and ogled at us like monkeys in cage.
From the watching hungry crowd someone yelled out “Ooooi…u never play my favourite song u o’rang tada balek umah.”

Before that, we were forewarned by some wayward kampungaites that if we ever were to play to the wrong tune, or sing like drunken toads, or even play song that sounds likes going to a funeral - WE DIE.
That scared the s**t out of us.

Then, with much hesitation we started our “concerto,’ braved ourselves and played like Beatles and Elvis and a lil’bit of Deep Purple in us - put together. Half the crowd went crazy, drunk, became rowdy and at one point we heard someone holler out, “Heh! You’all good lah.”

We heard it, I heard it and the rest, what shall I say became … MUSIK Graduation. They made us strum, bang, sing, dance and wiggle till 12 am – way past the fees they paid us. The next 3 days we came down with sore throats and laryngitis - hehehe.

Dedicated in memory to the bassist who committed suicide after few gigs with the band.

The Chimeara ... more..latest

...just came to know the brainsick Chimeara was white-washed in its own turf. Left the 'crime' scene harangued by its own folly. Now the word is - How? I mean how when unfaced, would The Chimeara face the faces. I can only visualize it living in apathy, drowning in its own fatuous state of mind and lastly grossly hopefully living out in infamy.

The underlining statement of the day :
NEVER, I MEAN NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF THE UNCHARTERED HUMAN MIND.

Ask Uri Geller.

How Low can you Go...

STUPID IS WHAT STUPID NECKS DOES.

The 4th Kind...

Need to watch this movie. By Hook or Crook.


http://movies.yahoo.com/feature/buzz-log-fourth-kind.html

Another wow factor...wella..

Last night just before the West Ham / Arsenal game, I got on-line to chat.
For reasons unknown, I've changed my 'killer' opener. My new first-line-opener is rather now subtle and short...alas even with that I still get some nut cases coming back to me their zany walnut answers.

Anyway, there was this lady chatter, - 'You never know what to expect until you open that box of chocolates - Forest Gump - remmy that!']

I pinged this person with this msg: "Miss or Mr?"
Reply: "Former"

The rest was the night's history. Enjoyed the chat and she being in the Diplomatic Services doing her PhD, exchanged ideas and what not and what you know, she's from ma former home-town...Hmmm

Before she left, I surprised her with a killer-Q: "Do you know one Cik Aini Yusuf?"

She : Goodness! Ya...I sure do. HOW DO YOU KNOW HER? with her tone heightened and quizzed. "Heh! who are you? How come you know so much of the Diplomatic stuff?"

Pretttttt....The game started. I deliberately DCed my comp and left.

Our Big Blue Marble is a small WORLD after all.

Donald Maass..wow factor...

Over the past few weeks I've been feverishly writing to agents all over the world hoping to find that one lil' opener, spark for representation.

And I wrote to Donald Maass.

Two days ago to my utter wow...astonishment, the Donald Maass himself ACTUALLY replied. It came with the normal rejection template but I felt ecstatic reading his letter.

Why?

How often does one [a small time aspiring novelist like me ] get a reply from one of the leading Literary Agents from the Big Apple.

For info : Donald Maass agency churns out New York Bestsellers out of every writer or author they represent. { almost }

I'm not sad nor disheartened being rejected but feeling-felicitous as my work being read and appraised by literary giants.

I'll still wana continue this journey of mine seeking for representation and prove to that 'washout-dork' that I will MAKE it as a novelist and that he will READ my book and that MAKE him sickly swallow his own words. Prolly, I might ask him if he would like ketchup to marinate with his words before I shoot him in his foot and make him apologize for his daftness. {I'm merely challenging my self pursuing my personal glory as a writer } This is the chap who told he's gonna publish his novel which I'm still waiting for, 5 years down the line.....hahahaha. [ lil'talk ]

Anyway...make haste ... my journey for representation continues........

Below is the letter from Donald Maass himself.

""Dear Siva Manika/ Author:

Thanks for your query. I apologize for this form response, but the volume of mail I receive makes it impossible to send individual replies in every case.

As to your material, I am afraid I must pass. I represent a very full list of writers, and must be highly selective in adding to it. I realize that it is difficult to judge your potential from a query alone; nevertheless, please know that we give serious attention to every letter, outline and writing sample that we receive.

I wish I could talk with every author who contacts us. Although that is not possible, you can read an interview with me on the subject of career development on my agency’s website at www.maassagency.com .

Thank you for contacting me. I wish you the very best of luck in your search for representation.

Sincerely,

DONALD MAASS""

They say failure is the pillar of success...these are the lil'things that inspires me to power up, drink red bull...hahaha..and move further to achieving my literary goal.

Thanks Donald for the reply.

Pssttt:: there's a lil'bit of good news from Australia.. have to wait till December.

The Chimeara Cometh...

I can’t put my finger down and point to the one word to describe The Chimeara.
But given a choice, I'd simply put it this way - a three-in-one well-cloaked knifing troll-haired ogre.

Nausea disgust blunt - how not to feel all of those and yet not go ballistic over this frenzy hunger craving xenophobic mane-fur-scaled Chimeara. Just when the has-been victims joyed to the tunes of heartease and peace treaty, HELL opened its gates ajar and let loose her best advocate – the nipper wastrel behemoth Chimeara thus ending all tranquillity and sliding its victims down deep into a grapevine of mayhem and gloom.

The mirthless faces of the Chimeara’s victims expunged agony - inaudible.

It moves swift, waste no time in its covenant in obtaining what it needs, and desires. It dwells on the victims, oozes with fiendish moves drawing out their weaknesses and suffocating them to the expense of the Chimeara’s advantage. It’ll drag and dredge its victims from their cocoons and drown them with void pledges whilst playing to the tunes of deceit.

Thus, in the end the Chimeara when caught, will divert its attention away from what is deemed a wasteless crusade and point the blame away from the truth and cloud the sober with poisonous fibs.

The Chimeara came...
The Chimeara growled...
The Chimeara devoured...
The Chimeara left unscathed...
The Chimeara is back to scathe ...

Who needs the movie 2012 or Nostradamus to tell us about Armageddon? By God! We have The Chimeara.
++ I just felt compelled to write the above over the news of The Chimeara soon to be joining the HPES armada. Sick.

Quote Unquote...

Where there is an open mind, there will always be a frontier.
- Charles F. Kettering, 1876 - 1958

When we contemplate the whole globe as one great dewdrop, striped and dotted with continents and islands, flying through space with all other stars singing and shining together as one, the whole universe appears as an infinite storm of beauty.
- John Muir, 1838 - 1914

A mediocre teacher tells. The good explains. The superior demonstrates but a great teacher inspires.
- William Arthur Ward, 1921 – 1994

It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge.
- Albert Einstein, 1879 - 1955

Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
- Albert Einstein, 1879 - 1955

Books are the carriers of civilization. Without books, history is silent, literature dumb, science crippled, thought and speculation at a standstill.
- Barbara Tuchman

The books that the world calls immoral are the books that show the world its own shame.
- Oscar Wilde, 1854 - 1900

All Mankind has done, thought, gained or been, it is lying as in magic preservation in the pages of books. They are the choicest possessions of men.
- Thomas Carlyle, 1795 - 1881

We should be as careful of the books we read, as of the company we keep. The dead very often have more power than the living.
- Tryon Edwards

Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
- Pablo Picasso, 1881 – 1973

It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent; it is the one that is most adaptable to change.
- Charles Robert Darwin – 1809 – 1882

Education is too important to be left solely to the educators.
- Francis Keppel

The library is our house of intellect, our transcendental university, with one exception: no one graduates from a library. No one possibly can, and no one should.
- Vartan Gregorian

I'm of a fearsome mind to throw my arms around every living librarian who crosses my path, on behalf of the souls they never knew they saved.
- Barbara Kingsolver

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss it you will land among the stars.
- Les Brown

We are shut up in schools and college recitation rooms for ten or fifteen years, and come out at last with a bellyful of words and do not know a thing.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson, 1803 - 1882

Quote Unquote...

Where there is an open mind, there will always be a frontier.
- Charles F. Kettering, 1876 - 1958

When we contemplate the whole globe as one great dewdrop, striped and dotted with continents and islands, flying through space with all other stars singing and shining together as one, the whole universe appears as an infinite storm of beauty.
- John Muir, 1838 - 1914

A mediocre teacher tells. The good explains. The superior demonstrates but a great teacher inspires.
- William Arthur Ward, 1921 – 1994

It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge.
- Albert Einstein, 1879 - 1955

Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
- Albert Einstein, 1879 - 1955

Books are the carriers of civilization. Without books, history is silent, literature dumb, science crippled, thought and speculation at a standstill.
- Barbara Tuchman

The books that the world calls immoral are the books that show the world its own shame.
- Oscar Wilde, 1854 - 1900

All Mankind has done, thought, gained or been, it is lying as in magic preservation in the pages of books. They are the choicest possessions of men.
- Thomas Carlyle, 1795 - 1881

We should be as careful of the books we read, as of the company we keep. The dead very often have more power than the living.
- Tryon Edwards

Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
- Pablo Picasso, 1881 – 1973

It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent; it is the one that is most adaptable to change.
- Charles Robert Darwin – 1809 – 1882

Education is too important to be left solely to the educators.
- Francis Keppel

The library is our house of intellect, our transcendental university, with one exception: no one graduates from a library. No one possibly can, and no one should.
- Vartan Gregorian

I'm of a fearsome mind to throw my arms around every living librarian who crosses my path, on behalf of the souls they never knew they saved.
- Barbara Kingsolver

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss it you will land among the stars.
- Les Brown

We are shut up in schools and college recitation rooms for ten or fifteen years, and come out at last with a bellyful of words and do not know a thing.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson, 1803 - 1882

The quientessence in me says ... I've learned...

* Money is a lousy way of keeping score...
* Your family won't for always be there for you...
* Either you control your attitude or it controls you...
* It's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be...
* No matter how much I care, people just don't care back...
* We shouldn't compare ourselves to the best that others do...
* It takes years to build up trust and only nanoseconds to destroy it...
* Credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being...
* People you care most in life are taken from you too soon...
* We're responsible for whatever we do, no matter how we achingly feel...
* We don't have to change friends if we understand friends do change...
* My best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have a 'helluva' time...
* I can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life...
* No matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for you grief...
* You shouldn't be eager to finding out a secret. Believe that it CAN ruin your life forever...
* It's not what I have in my life but whom I have that counts...
* Our lives can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know us...
* Two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different...
* You can get by on a charm for 15 minutes. After that, you'd better wake up...
* True friendship continues to grow even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love...
* Leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them...
* Sometimes when I'm angry, I've the right to but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel...
* You cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved...
* Sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones to help you get back up...
* Heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done regardless of the consequences...
* No matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you once in a while and you must forgive them for that...
* No matter how hard you try to protect children, they will eventually get hurt and you hurt in the process...
* Our background and circumstances influence who we are but we are responsible for what we become off it...
* When you think you've no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you'll find the strength to give...
* Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have...
* Regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is, the passion fades eventually...
* Just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other; and if don't argue, it doesn't mean they do...
* It's hard to determine where to draw the line and stand for what you believe by not hurting one's feelings...
* People you aren't related to can, love and teach you more than you possibly know...
* Modern times have proven families aren't biological...
* Maturity has more to do with types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them then many birthdays you've celebrated...

Wish.....[fm an old email]

Credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

You cannot make someone love you; all you can do is be someone who can be loved.

No matter how much we care, we do not always get the same back.

It takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

It is not what you've in your life but whom that counts.

It’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

We are responsible for whatever that we do, no matter how we feel.

Money is a lousy way of keeping score.

Biggest mistakes in life are made and built by parents not children.

You can get by on a charm for about 15 minutes after that, you'd better know something about it.

You shouldn't compare yourself to the best that others can do you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

You should always leave loved ones with loving words It may be the last time you see them.

You can keep going, long after you can't.

I've learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

Heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

My best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

Sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones to help you get back up.

Sometimes when I'm angry, I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

True friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance it goes for true love.

Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to it doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

Maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I've learnt that your family won't always be there for you.

It may seem funny, but people you aren't related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren't biological.

No matter how good a friend is they’re going to hurt you once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

No matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for you grief.

Our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

Just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don’t love each other; and just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

We don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

You shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret it could change your life forever.

Two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

No matter how hard you try to protect your children they will eventually get hurt and you hurt in the process.

Our life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don’t even know us.

When you think you've no more to give when a friend cries out to you, you'll find the strength to help.

People whom you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

It’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people's feelings and standing up for what you believe.


I could wish for my life to be perfect, it would be tempting but I
would have to decline, for life would no longer teach me anything.


Here's wishing all Hindu bloggers a Happy Divali.

"Ininyeah Deepavali Nan valthugal "

Woman...

(This is a must read!!!!)


When I created the heavens and the earth, I spoke them into being.
When I created man, I formed him and breathed life into his nostrils.
But you, woman, I fashioned after I breathed the breath of life into man, because your nostrils are too delicate.

I allowed a deep sleep to come over him so I could patiently and perfectly fashion you.
Man was put to sleep so that he could not interfere with the creativity.

From one bone, I fashioned you.
I chose the bone that protects man's life.
I chose the rib, which protects his heart and lungs and supports him,as you are meant to do.

Around this one bone, I shaped you....... I modeled you.
I created you perfectly and beautifully.
Your characteristics are as the rib, strong yet delicate and fragile.

You provide protection for the most delicate organ in man, his heart.
His heart is the center of his being; his lungs hold the breath of life.

The ribcage will allow itself to be broken before it will allow damage to the heart. Support man as the rib cage supports the body.

You were not taken from his feet, to be under him, nor were you taken from his head, to be above him.
You were taken from his side, to stand beside him and be held close to his side.

You are my perfect angel.....You are my beautiful little girl.
You have grown to be a splendid woman of excellence, and my eyes fill
when I see the virtues in your heart.
Your eyes...don't change them.
Your lips, how lovely when they part in prayer.
Your nose, so perfect in form.
Your hands so gentle to touch. I've caressed your face in your deepest sleep.

I've held your heart close to mine.
Of all that lives and breathes, you are most like me.

Adam walked with Me in the cool of the day, yet he was lonely.
He could not see Me or touch Me. He could only feel Me.
So everything I wanted Adam to share and experience with Me, I fashioned in you; my Holiness, my Strength, my Purity, my Love, my Protection and Support.

You are special because you are an extension of me.
Man represents my image, woman my emotions.
Together, you represent the totality of God.

So man......treat woman well.

Love her, respect her, for she is fragile. In hurting her, you hurt me.

What you do to her, you do to me.
In crushing her, you only damage your own heart; the heart of your Father, and the heart of her Father.
Woman, support man. In humility, show him the power of emotion.

I have given you.
In gentle quietness, show your strength.
In love, show him that you are the rib that protects his inner self.

Did you not know that WOMAN is special in God's eyes?

The Correct Way of Eating Fruits...

[ Excerpt extracted...Unedited ]
Eating fruits is all about buying, cutting it up and popping the fruit into our mouths. But its also important to know how and when to eat fruits.

Fruits have the highest water content compared to any other food. The vitamins, minerals, carbohydrates, amino acids and fatty acids a human requires can be derived from fruits.

When a fruit is consumed correctly, nothing can surpass it.

For those wanting to lose a weight, the proper consumption of fruits helps. A survey made and was found those who consume fruits at every meal tend to want to eat less in the next meal. The reason being the sugar content in the fruit. A particular substance in fruits could cut the risk of heart disease or heart attack. The substance protects the heart by preventing the blood from becoming thick and plugging up the arteries. Fruit-eating is cleansing! Fruit requires less energy to be digested than any other food.

Everything consumed by the human body breaks down in the system and is transformed into glucose, fructose, amino acids etc. The brain cannot function on anything except glucose. Fruit is glucose in the body.

Its digestion, absorption and assimilation requires only a short time. It does not break down food like chicken, mutton etc. Other foods spend about 1-4 hours in the stomach. Fruits are not digested in the stomach. Most fruits are predigested except for bananas, dates and dried fruits. They pass through the stomach in twenty to thirty minutes as if going through a tunnel. They break down and release giving nutrients in the intestines.


FRUITS SHOULD BE EATEN IN AN EMPTY STOMACH.

Eating fruits play a major role in detoxify your system, supplying you with a great deal of energy for weight loss and other life activities. Fruit is the most important food.

If you have two slices of bread and a slice of fruit, the slice of fruit is ready to go straight through the stomach into the intestines, but it is prevented from doing so. In the meantime the whole meal rots, ferments and turns to acid.

When a fruit comes into contact with food in the stomach and the digestive juices, the entire mass of food begins to spoil. Eat your fruits in an empty stomach or before your meals!

You have heard people complaining - every time I eat water melon I burp, when I eat durians my stomach bloats up, when I eat bananas I feel like running to the toilet etc - actually all these will not arise if you eat the fruit in an empty stomach. The fruit mixes with the putrefying of other food and produces gas and hence you bloat!

Graying hair, balding, nervous outburst, dark circles under the eyes - all these will not happen if you take fruits in an empty stomach. According to Dr. Herbert Shelton, who researched on this says, there is no such thing as oranges and lemons being acidic as fruits become alkaline in our body, If you have mastered the correct way of eating fruits, you have the secret of beauty, longevity, health, energy, and normal weight.

When you need to drink fruit juice - drink only fresh fruit juice. Not from the cans. Don't even drink juice that has been heated up. Don't eat cooked fruits because you don't get the nutrients at all. You only get to taste. So stop making 'goreng pisang' or 'durian porridge' if you want nutrients. Cooking destroys all the vitamins.

Eating a whole fruit is better than drinking the juice. Should you drink the juice, drink it mouthful by mouthful slowly. Because you must let it mix with your saliva before swallowing it.

You can go on a 3-day fruit fast to cleanse your body. Just eat fruits and drink fruit juice throughout the 3 days and you will be surprised to see a more radiant self. During the fruit fast you can eat fruits, prepared in salad forms and make it more interesting.

The Beauty of Prose...

No one said English is easy to learn but it is definitely easy to love

The Bandage Was Wound Around The Wound.

The Farm Was Used To Produce Produce

The Dump Was So Full That It Had To Refuse More Refuse.

We Must Polish The Polish Furniture

He Could Lead If He Would Get The Lead Out

The Soldier Decided To Desert His Dessert In The Desert.

Since There Is No Time Like The Present, He Thought It Was Time To Present The Present.

A Bass Was Painted On The Head Of The Bass Drum

When Shot At, The Dove Dove Into The Bushes.

I Did Not Object To The Object.

The Insurance Was Invalid For The Invalid.

There Was A Row Among The Oarsmen About How To Row.

They Were Too Close To The Door To Close It.

The Buck Does Funny Things When The Does Are Present.

A Seamstress And A Sewer Fell Down Into A Sewer Line.

To Help With Planting, The Farmer Taught His Sow To Sow.

The Wind Was Too Strong To Wind The Sail.

After A Number Of Injections My Jaw Got Number.

Upon Seeing The Tear In The Painting I Shed A Tear.

I Had To Subject The Subject To A Series Of Tests.

How Can I Intimate This To My Most Intimate Friend?

English as she is sadly broken...

ENGLISH AS SHE IS BROKEN EVERYDAY………………..


Hotel lobby, Bucharest:
The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.


Hotel elevator, Paris:
Please leave your values at the front desk.


Supermarket, Hong Kong:
For your convenience we recommend courteous efficient self-service.


Taken from a menu, Poland:
Salad a firm’s own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten in the country people’s fashion.


The soviet weekly:
There will be a Moscow exhibition of arts by 15,000 soviet republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years


East African newspaper:
A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of the workers.


Vienna hotel:
In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter.


Dentist, Hong Kong:
Teeth extracted by the latest methodists.


Tourist agency, Czechoslovakia:
Take one of our horse-driven city tours. We guarantee no miscarriages.


Clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.


In a Swiss mountain inn:
Special today – no ice-cream


On the door of a Moscow hotel room:
If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.

Passing by and I paased by...

Medicine, law, business, engineering. These are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life.
But words, poetry, beauty, romance, love. These are what we stay alive for.
- Tom Schulman, Dead Poets Society (1989)

Wishes in shades...

Be simple

Choose work that is in harmony with your values

Watch sunrise once a year and make it an inspiration

Never give up on your hope and dreams; miracles do happen

Learn to listen; opportunities sometimes knock very softly

Do unto others what you want others to do unto you

Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you care

Be the most positive and enthusiastic person you can be

Commit yourself to constant self-improvement

Learn to relax and clear your thoughts every once in a while


Be truthful and logic for they are the champions of winners

Eat strawberries

Drink tea

Take time to smell the roses

Verbal Bloopers - English

There was a time I moonlighted as a translator in a government organisation. Having no translatory skills what-so-ever, I braved the crowd and landed a job where I was to translator and write speeches for Menteri and Pangarah from Malay to English and vise-verse.

Even before I could solemnly draw out my pen which is suppose to be mightier than sword, I was summoned to the desk of my boss..Ehmm..lady boss.


"Ha Siva...mari...duduk sini," she pointed me to a chair. I sat with a pin drop silence.

"Do you know what you are required to do? You have any idea the nature of your job and responsibility," she asked. I stared at her face like a wall clock.

"Actually...err..hmmm...No idea." She laughed, then took out a file, gave it to me and said, "Go translate this and show me."

I grabbed the Pink-Manila covered file, glazed, stood-up and as I was about to leave, she said, "Don't translate like they do in Hogn Kogn movies...okay."

I believe this is what she meant.

*“I threat you! I challenge you meet me on the roof tonight for a duet!”

*“I will kill you until you are dead from it!”

*“The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?”

*“I got knife scars more than the number of your leg’s hair!”

*“I am damn unsatisfied to be killed in this way.”

*“Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep.”

*“I’ll fire aimlessly if you don’t come out!”

*“You are too useless. And now I must beat you.”

*“Gun wounds again?”

*“A normal person wouldn’t steal pituitaries.”

*“You always use violence. I should’ve ordered glutinous rice chicken.”

*“Take my advice, or I’ll spank you without pants.”

*“Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected.”

*“Who gave you the nerve to get killed here?”

*“Quiet or I’ll blow your throat up.”

*“You daring lousy guy.”

*“Beat him out of recognizable shape!”

*“How can you use my intestines as a gift?”

*“Damn, I’ll burn you into a BBQ chicken!”

*“This will be of fine service for you, you bag of the scum. I am sure you will not mind that I remove your manhoods and leave them out on the dessert flour for your aunts to eat.”

*“Yah-hah, evil spider woman! I have captured you by the short rabbits and can now deliver you violently to your gynecologist for a thorough extermination.”

*“Greetings, large black person. Let us not forget to form a team up together and go into the country to inflict the pain of our karate feets on some of the giant lizard person.”

*Your spear is useless. You better use it for mixing excretory.

*Now I feel flatulent, and you did it.

*My innards have all been disturbed by him.

*That may disarray my intestines.

*I please your uterus. You kiss my toes. It’s fair.

*“This is the Martial Arts Competition, not a place for fighting!” (from Kung Fu)PLEASE TRANSLATE.

Vivekananda's World's Parliment of Religion Address... a late entry.

Response to Welcome At The World's Parliament of Religions,
Chicago, 11 September 1893.


"Sisters and Brothers of the Nation, It fills my heart with joy unspeakable to rise in response to the warm and cordial welcome which you have given us. I thank you in the name of the most ancient order of monks in the world; I thank you in the name of the mother of religions; and I thank you in the name of the millions and millions of Hindu people of all classes and sects. My thanks, also, to some of the speakers on this platform who, referring to the delegates from the Orient, have told you that these men from far-off nations may well claim the honour of bearing to different lands the idea of toleration. I am proud to belong to a religion which has taught the world both tolerance and universal acceptance. We believe not only in universal toleration, but we accept all religions as true. I am proud to belong to a nation which has sheltered the persecuted and the refugees of all religions and all nations of the earth. I am proud to tell you that we have gathered in our bosom the purest remnant of the Israelites, who came to the southern India and took refuge with us in the very year in which their holy temple was shattered to pieces by Roman tyranny. I am proud to belong to the religion which has sheltered and is still fostering the remnant of the grand Zoroastrian nation. I will quote to you, brethren, a few lines from a hymn which I remember to have repeated from my earliest boyhood, which is every day repeated by millions of human beings:

"As the different streams having there sources in different
places all mingle their water in the sea, so, O Lord, the
different paths which men take through different tendencies,
various though they appear, crooked or straight, all lead to Thee."

The present convention, which is one of the most august assemblies ever held, is in itself a vindication, a declaration to the world, of the wonderful doctrine preached in the Gita:

"Whosoever comes to Me, through whatsoever form, I reach him;
all men are struggling through paths which in the end lead to Me."

Sectarianism, bigotry, and its horrible descendant, fanaticism, have long possessed this beautiful earth. They have filled the earth with violence, drenched it often and often with human blood, destroyed civilization, and sent whole nations to despair. Had it not been for these horrible demons, human society would be far more advanced than it is now? But their time is come; and I fervently hope that the bell that tolled this morning in honour of this convention may be the death-knell of all fanaticism, of all persecutions with the sword or with the pen, and of all uncharitable feelings between persons wending their way to the same goal."

Swami Vivekananda, at age 30, unprepared and afraid was only given half of the lunch hour to address his maiden speech. Instead the great Swami, fearing and standing facing only a handful of delegates, spoke akin a lion for more than an hour to the thunderous applause of the gathered delegates of seven thousand who had packed the hall wanting more. With the first five opening words of his speech, "Sisters and Brothers of the Nation" the crowd rose to a standing ovation and applaused for a mere three minutes.
The Humble Hermit swathed in an orange loin cloth, shivering thru his bones at the heights of Chicago autumn, spoke and won the crowd over, becoming a man the world refused to forget till today.

Chicago Addresses -2 . Why We Disagree.. 15th September 1893

I will tell you a little story. Thou have heard the eloquent speaker who has just finished say, "Let us cease from abusing each other," and he was very sorry that there should be always so much variance. But I think I should tell you a story which would illustrate the cause of this variance. A frog lived in a well. It had lived there for a long time. It was born there and brought up there, and yet was a little, small frog. Of course, the evolutionists were not there then to tell us whether the frog lost its eyes or not, but, for our story's sake, we must take it for granted that it had its eyes, and that it every day cleansed the water of all the worms and bacilli that lived in it with an energy that would do credit to our modern bacteriologists. In this way it went on and became a little sleek and fat. Well, one day another flog that lived in the sea came and fell into the well.

'Where are you form?'
'I am from the sea.'
'The sea! How big is that?
Is it as big as my well?' and he took a leap how one side of the
well to the other.
'My friend,' said the frog of the sea,
'how do you compare the sea with your little well?'
Then the frog took another leap and asked, 'Is your sea so big?'
'What nonsense you speak, to compare the sea with your well!'
'Well, then,' said the frog of the well, 'nothing can be bigger
than my well; there can be nothing bigger than this; this fellow is
a liar, so turn him out.'

That has been the difficulty all the while.

I am a Hindu. I am sitting in my own little well and thinking that the whole world is my little well. The Christian sits in his little well and thinks the whole world is his well. The Mohammedan sits in his little well and thinks that is the whole world. l have to thank you of America for the great attempt you are making to break down the barriers of this little world of ours, and hope that, in the future, the Lord will help you to accomplish your purpose.


Chicago Addresses - 3. PAPER ON HINDUISM.
Read at the Parliament on 19th September 1893

Three religions now stand in the world which has come down to us from time prehistoric - Hinduism, Zoroastrianism, and Judaism. They have all received tremendous shocks, and all of them prove by their survival their internal strength. But while Judaism failed to absorb Christianity and was driven out of its place of birth by its all-conquering daughter, and a handful of Parsees is all that remains to tell the tale of their grand religion, sect after sect arose in India and seemed to shake the religion of the Vedas to its very foundations, but like the waters of the sea-shore in a tremendous earthquake it receded only for a while, only to return in an all-absorbing Hood, a thousand times more vigorous, and when the tumult of the rush was over, these sects were all sucked in, absorbed and assimilated into the immense body of the mother faith.

From the high spiritual flights of the Vedanta philosophy, of which the latest discoveries of science seem like echoes, to the low ideas of idolatry with its multifarious mythology, the agnosticism of the Buddhists and the atheism of the Jains, each and all have a place in the Hindu's religion.

Where then, the question arises, where is the common centre to which all these widely diverging radii converge? Where is the common basis upon which all these seemingly hopeless contradictions rest? And this is the question I shall at- tempt to answer.

The Hindus have received their religion through revelation, the Vedas. They hold that the Vedas are without beginning and without end. It may sound ludicrous to this audience, how a book can be without beginning or end. But by the Vedas no books are meant. They mean the accumulated treasury of spiritual laws discovered by different persons in different times. Just as the law of gravitation existed before its discovery, and would exist if all humanity forgot it, so is it with the laws that govern the spiritual relations between soul and soul and between individual spirits and the Father of all spirits were there before their discovery, and would remain even if we forgot them.

The discoverers of these laws are called Rishis, and we honour them as perfected beings. I am glad to tell this audience that some of the very greatest of them were women.

Here it may be said that these laws as laws may be without end, but they must have had a beginning. The Vedas teach us that creation is without beginning or end. Science is said to have proved that the sum total of cosmic energy is always the same. Then, if there was a time when nothing existed, where was all this manifested energy?

Some say it was in a potential form in God. In that case God is sometimes potential and sometimes kinetic, which would make Him mutable? Everything mutable is a compound and everything compound must undergo that change which is called destruction. So God would die, which is absurd-Therefore, there never was a time when there was no creation.

If I may be allowed to use a simile, creation and creator are two lines, without beginning and without end, zoning parallel to each other. God is the ever-active providence, by whose power systems after systems are being evolved out of chaos, made to run for a time, and again destroyed. This is what the Brahmin boy repeats every day:

"The sun and the moon, the Lord created like the suns and the moons of previous cycles."

And this agrees with modern science. Here I Stand and if I shut my eyes, and try to conceive my existence, ‘I,' 'I', what is the idea before me? The idea of a body. Am I, then, nothing but a combination of material substances? The Vedas declare, 'No' I am a spirit living in a body: I am not the body. The body will die, but I shall not die. Here I am in this body; it will fall, bull shall go on living. I had also a past. The soul was not created, for creation means a combination, which means a certain future dissolution. If then the soul was created, it must die. Some are born happy, enjoy perfect health with beautiful body, mental vigour, and all wants supplied. Others are born miserable; some are without hands or feet; others again are idiots, and only drag on a wretched existence. Why, if they are all created, why does a just and merciful God create one happy and another unhappy, why is He so partial? Nor would it mend matters in the least to hold that those who are miserable in this life will be happy in a ôare one. Why should a man be miserable even here in the reign of a just and merciful God?

In the second place, the idea of a creator God does not explain the anomaly, but simply expresses the cruel Rat of an all-powerful being. There must have been causes, then, before his birth, to make a man miserable or happy and those were his past actions.

Are not all the tendencies of the mind and the body accounted for by inherited aptitude? Here are two parallel lines of existence - one of the minds, the other of matter. If matter and its transformations answer for all that we have, there is no necessity for supposing the existence of a soul. But it cannot be proved that thought has been evolved out of matter; and if a philosophical monism is inevitable, spiritual monism is certainly logical and no less desirable than a materialistic monism; but neither of these is necessary here.

We cannot deny that bodies acquire certain tendencies from heredity, but those tendencies only mean the physical configuration through which a peculiar mind alone can act in a peculiar way.
There are other tendencies peculiar to a soul caused by his past actions. And a soul with a certain tendency would, by the laws of affinity, take birth in a body which is the fittest instrument for the display of that tendency. This is in accord with science, for science wants to explain everything by habit, and habit is got through repetitions. So repetitions are necessary to explain the natural habits of a new born soul. And since they were not obtained in this present life, they must have come down from past lives.

There is another suggestion. Taking all these for granted, how is it that I do not remember anything of my past life? This can be easily explained. I am now speaking English. It is not my mother tongue; in fact, no words of my mother tongue are now present in my consciousness; but let me try to bring them up, and they rush in. That shows that consciousness is only the surface of mental ocean, and within its depths are stored up all our experiences. Try and struggle, they would come up. and you would be conscious even of your past life.

This is direct and demonstrative evidence. Verification is the perfect proof of a theory, and here is the challenge thrown to the world by the Rishis. We have discovered the secret by which the very depths of the ocean of memory can be stirred up - try it and you would get a complete reminiscence of your past life.

So then the Hindu believes that he is a spirit. Him the sword cannot pierce - him the fire cannot burn - him the water cannot melt - him the air cannot dry. The Hindu believes that every soul is a circle whose circumference is nowhere but whose centre is located in the body and that death means the change of the centre from holy to body. Nor is the soul bound by the conditions of matter.

In its very essence, it is flee, unbounded, holy, pure, and perfect. But somehow or other it finds itself tied down to matter and thinks of itself as matter. Why should the free, perfect, and pure be thus under the thraldom of matter, is the next question. How can the perfect soul be deluded into the belief that it is imperfect? We have been told that the Hindus shirk the question and say that no such question can be there- Some thinkers want to answer it by positing one or more quasi-perfect beings, and use big scientific names to fill up the gap. But naming is not explaining. The question remains the same. How can the perfect become the quasi-perfect; how can the pure, the absolute change even a microscopic particle of its nature? But the Hindu is sincere. He does not want to take shelter under sophistry. He is brave enough to face the question in a manly fashion; and his answer is: 'I do not know.' I do not know how the perfect being, the soul, came to think of itself as imperfect, as Joined to and conditioned by matter.' But the fact is a fact for all that. It is a fact in everybody's consciousness that one thinks of oneself as the body. The Hindu does not attempt to explain why one thinks one is the body. The answer that it is the will of God is no explanation. This is nothing more than what the Hindu says, 'I do not know.'

Well, then, the human soul is eternal and immortal, perfect and infinite, and death means only a change of centre from one body to another. The present is determined by our past actions and the future by the present. The soul will go on evolving up or reverting back from birth to birth and death to death. But here is another question: Is man a tiny boat in a tempest, raised one moment on the foamy crest of a billow and dashed down into a yawning chasm the next, rolling to and from at the mercy of good and bad actions – a powerless, helpless wreck in an ever-raging, ever-rushing, uncompromising current of cause and effect - a little moth placed under the wheel of causation, which rolls on crushing everything in its way and waits not for the widow's tears or the orphan's cry?

The heart sinks at the idea, yet this is the law of nature. Is there no hope? Is there no escape? - was the cry that went up from the bottom of the heart of despair. It reached the throne of mercy, and words of hope and consolation came down and inspired a Vedic sage, and he stood up before the world and in trumpet voice proclaimed the glad tidings: 'Hear, ye children of immortal bliss! even ye that reside in higher spheres! I have found the Ancient One who is beyond all darkness, all delusion: knowing Him alone you shall be saved from death over again. 'Children of immortal bliss' -what a sweet, what a hopeful name! Allow me to call you, brethren, by that sweet name -heirs of immortal bliss - yea, the Hindu refuses to call you sinners. We are the Children of God, the sharers of immortal bliss, holy and perfect beings. Divinities on earth - sinners! It is a sin to call a ma. so; it is standing libel on human nature. Come up, O lions, and shake off the delusion that you are sheep; you are souls immortal, spirits free, blest and eternal; ye are not matter, ye are not bodies; matter is your servant, not you the servant of matter.

Thus it is that the Vedas proclaim not a dreadful combination of unforgiving laws, not an endless prison of cause and effect, but that at the head of all these laws, in and through every particle of matter and force, stands One, 'by whose command the wind blows, the fire burns, the clouds rain and death stalks upon the earth.'

And what is His nature?

He is everywhere, the pure and formless One, the Almighty and the All-merciful. 'Thou art our father, Thou art our mother, Thou art our beloved friend, Thou art the source of all strength; give us strength. Thou art He that beareth the burdens of the universe; help me bear the little burden of this life.' Thus sang the Rishis of the Veda. And how to worship Him? Through love. 'He is to be worshiped as the one beloved, dearer than everything in this and the next life.'

This is the doctrine of love declared in the Vedas, and let us see how it is fully developed and taught by Krishna whom the Hindus believe to have been God incarnate on earth.

He taught that a man ought to live in this world like a lotus leaf, which grows in water but is never moistened by water; so a man ought to live in the world - his heart to God and his hands to work.

It is good to love God for hope of reward in this or the next world, but it is better to love God for love's sake; and the prayer goes: 'Lord, I do not want wealth nor children nor learning. If it be Thy will, I shall go from birth to birth; but grant me this, that I may love Thee without the hope of reward - love unselfishly for love's sake.'

One of the disciples of Krishna, the then Emperor of India, wag driven from his kingdom by his enemies and had to take shelter with his queen, in a forest in the Himalayas and there one day the queen asked how it was that he, the most virtuous of men, should suffer so much misery. Udhishthira answered, 'Be hold, my queen, the Himalayas, how grand and beautiful they are; I love them. They do not give me any- thing but my nature is to love the grand, the beautiful, therefore I love them. Similarly, I love the Lord. He is the source of all beauty, of all sublimity. He is the only object to beloved; my nature is to love Him, and therefore I love. I do not pray for any- thing; I do not ask for anything. Let Him place me wherever He likes. I must love Him for love's sake. I cannot trade in love.'

The Vedas teach that the soul is divine, only held in the bondage of matter; perfection will be reached when this bond will burst, and the word they use for it is, therefore, Mukti - freedom, freedom from the bonds of imperfection, freedom from death and misery- And this bondage can only fall off through the mercy of God, and this mercy comes on the pure. So purity is the condition of His mercy. How does that mercy act? He reveals Himself to the pure heart; the pure and the stainless see God, yea, even in this life; then and then only all the crookedness of the heart is made straight. Then all doubt ceases. He is no more the freak of a terrible law of causation. This is the very centre, the very vital conception of Hinduism. The Hindu does not want to live upon words and theories, if there are existences beyond the ordinary sensuous existence; he wants to come face to face with them. If there is a soul in him which is not matter, if there is an all-merciful universal Soul, he will Rota Him direct. He must see Him, and that alone can destroy all doubts. So the best proof a Hindu sage gives about the soul, about God, is: 'I have seen the soul; I have seen God.' And that is the only condition of perfection. The Hindu religion does not consist in struggles and attempts to believe a certain doctrine or dogma, but in realizing - not in believing, but in being and becoming.

Thus the whole object of their system is by constant struggle to become perfect, to become divine, to reach God, and see God; and this reaching God, seeing God, becoming perfect even as the Father in Heaven is perfect, constitutes the religion of the Hindus.

And what becomes of a man when he attains perfection? He lives a life of bliss infinite. He enjoys infinite and perfect bliss, having obtained the only thing in which man ought to have pleasure, namely God, and enjoys the bliss with God.

So far all the Hindus are agreed. This is the common religion of all the sects of India; but then perfection is absolute, and the absolute cannot be two or three. It cannot have any qualities. It cannot be an individual. And so when a soul becomes perfect and absolute, it must become one with Brahman, and it would only realize the Lord as the perfection, the reality, of its own nature and existence, the existence absolute, knowledge absolute, and bliss absolute. We have often and often read this called the losing of individuality and becoming a stock or a stone.

'He jests at scars that never felt a wound.'

I tell you it is nothing of the kind. If it is happiness to enjoy the consciousness of this small body, it must be greater happiness to enjoy the consciousness of two bodies, the measure of happiness increasing with the consciousness of an increasing number of bodies, the Rim, the ultimate of happiness, being reached when it would become a universal consciousness.

Therefore, to gain this infinite universal individuality, this miserable little prison - individuality must go. Then alone can death cease when I am one with life, then alone can misery cease when I am one with happiness itself, then alone can all errors cease when I am one with knowledge itself; and this is the necessary scientific conclusion- Science has proved to me that physical individuality is a delusion, that really my body is one little continuously changing body in an unbroken ocean of matter, and Advaita (unity) is the necessary conclusion with my other counterpart, Soul.

Science is nothing but the finding of unity. As soon as science would reach perfect unity, it would stop from further progress, because it would reach the goal. Thus chemistry could not progress farther when it would discover one element out of which all others could be made. Physics would stop when it would be able to fulfil its services in discovering one energy of which all the others are hut manifestations, and the science of religion become perfect when it would discover Him who is the one life in a universe of death, Him who is the constant basis of an ever-changing world, One who is the only Soul of which all souls are but delusive manifestations. Thus is it, through multiplicity and duality, that the ultimate unity is reached. Religion can go no farther. This is the goal of all science.

All science is bound to come to this conclusion in the long run. Manifestation, and not creation, is the word of science today; and the Hindu is only glad that what he has been cherishing in his bosom for ages is going to be taught in more forcible language and with further light from the latest conclusions of science.

Descend we now from the aspirations of philosophy to the religion of the ignorant. At the very outset, I may tell you that there is no polytheism in India. In every temple, if one stands by and listens, one will find the worshipers applying all the attributes of God, including omnipresence. to the images. It is not polytheism, nor would the name henotheism explain the situation.

'The rose, called by any other name, would smell as sweet.' Names are not explanations.

I remember, as a boy, hearing a Christian missionary preach to crowd in India. Among other sweet things he was telling them was, that if he gave a blow to their idol with his stick. What could it do? One of his hearers sharply answered, 'If I abuse your God, what can He do?' ' ou would be punished,' said the preacher, 'when you die.' 'So my idol will punish you when you die,' retorted the Hindu.

The tree is known by its fruits. When l have seen amongst them that are called idolaters, men, the like of whom, in morality and spirituality and love, I have never seen anywhere, l stop and ask myself, 'Can sin beget holiness?'

Superstition is a great enemy of man, but bigotry is worse. Why does a Christian go to church? Why is the cross holy? Why is the face turned toward the sky in prayer? Why are there so many images in the Catholic Church? Why are there so many images in the minds of Protestants when they pray? My brethren, we can do more think about anything without a mental image than we can live without breathing- By the law of association the material image calls up the mental idea and vice versa. This is why the Hindu uses an external symbol when he worships. He will tell you. It helps to keep his mind fixed on the Being to whom he prays. He knows as well as you do that the image is not God, is not omnipresent. finer all, how much does omnipresence mean to almost the whole world? It stands merely as a word, a symbol. Has God superficial area? If not, when we repeat that word 'omnipresent', we think of the extended sky. or of space - that is all.

As we find that somehow or other, by the laws of our mental constitution, we have to associate our ideas of infinity with the image of the blue sky, or of the sea, so we naturally connect our idea of holiness with the image of a church, a mosque, or a cross.
The Hindus have associated the ideas of holiness, purity, truth, omnipresence, and such other ideas with different images and forms. But with this difference that while some people devote their whole lives to their idol of a church and never rise higher, because with them religion means an intellectual assent to certain doctrines and doing good to their fellows, the whole religion of the Hindu is cantered in realization. Man is to become divine by realizing the divine. Idols or temples or churches or books are only the supports, the helps, of his spiritual childhood; but on and on he must progress.

He must not stop anywhere. 'External worship, material worship'? 'Say the scriptures, 'is the lowest stage,' struggling to rise high, mental prayer is the next stage, but the highest stage is when the Lord has been realized., Mark, the same earnest man who is kneeling before the idol tells you, 'Him the sun cannot express, nor the moon, nor the stars, the lightning cannot express Him, nor what we speak of as fire; through Him they shine.' But he does not abuse anyone's idol or call its worship sin. He recognizes in it a necessary stage of life. 'The child is father of the man.' Would it be right for an old man to say that childhood is a sin or youth a sin?

If a man can realize his divine nature with the help of an image, would it be right to call that a sin? Nor, even when he has passed that stage, should he call it an error. To the Hindu, man is not travelling from error to truth, but from truth to truth, from lower to higher truth. To him all the religions from the lowest fetishism to the highest absolutism mean so many attempts of the human soul to grasp and realize the Infinite, each determined by the conditions of its birth and association, and each of these marks a stage of progress; and every soul is a young eagle soaring higher and higher, gathering more and more strength till it reaches the Glorious Sun.

Unity in variety is the plan of nature, and the Hindu has recognized it. Every other religion lays down certain fixed dogmas and tries to force society to adopt them. It places before society only one coat which must fit Jack and John and Henry, all alike. If it does not fit John or Henry he must go without a coat to cover his body. The Hindus have discovered that the absolute can only be realized, or thought of, or stated through the relative, and the images, crosses, and crescents are simply so many symbols - so many pegs to hang spiritual ideas on. It is not that this help is necessary for everyone, but those that do not need it have no right to say that it is wrong. Nor is it compulsory in Hinduism.

One thing I must tell you. Idolatry in India does not mean anything horrible. It is not the mother of harlots. On the other hand, it is the attempt of undeveloped minds to grasp high spiritual truths. The Hindus have their faults; they sometimes have their exceptions; but mark this, they are always for punishing their own bodies, and never for cutting the throats of their neighbours. If the Hindu fanatic burns himself on the pyre, he never lights the fire of Inquisition. And even this cannot be laid at the door of his religion any more than the burning of witches can be laid at the door of Christianity.

To the Hindu, then, the whole world of religions is only a travelling, a coming up, of different men and women, through various conditions and circumstances, to the same goal. Every religion is only evolving a God out of the material man, and the same God is the inspirer of all of them. Why, then, are there so many contradictions? They are only apparent, says the Hindu. The contradictions come from the same truth adapting itself to the varying circumstances of different natures.

It is the same light coming through glasses of different colours- And these little variations are necessary for purposes of adaptation. But in the heart of everything the same truth reigns. The Lord has declared to the Hindu in His incarnation as Krishna:
'I am in every religion as the thread through a string of pearls. Wherever thou seest extraordinary holiness and extraordinary power rising and purifying humanity, know thou that I am there. ' And what has been the result? I challenge the world to find, throughout the whole system of Sanskrit philosophy, any such expression as that the Hindu alone will be saved and not others. Says Vyasa, 'we find perfect men even beyond the pale of our caste and creed. 'One thing more. How, then, can the Hindu, whose whole fabric of thought centres in God, believe in Buddhism which is agnostic, or in Jainism which is atheistic?

The Buddhists or the Jains do not depend upon God; but the whole force of their religion is directed to the great central truth in every religion, to evolve a God out of man. They have not seen the Father, but they have seen the Son. And he that hath seen the Son bath seen the Father also.

This, brethren, is a short sketch of the religious ideas of the Hindus. The Hindu may have failed to carry out all his plans, but if there is ever to be a universal religion, it must be one which will have no location in place or time; which will be infinite like the God it will preach, and whose sun will shine upon the followers of Krishna and of Christ, on saints and sinners alike; which will not be Brahminic or Buddhistic, Christian or Mohammedan, but the sum total of all these. and still have infinite space for development; which in its catholicity will embrace in infinite arms, and find a place for, every human being from the lowest grovelling savage, not far removed from the brute, to the highest man towering by the virtues of his head and heart almost above humanity, making society stand in awe of him and doubt his human nature. It will be a religion which will have no place for persecution or intolerance in its polity, which will recognize divinity in every man and woman, and whose whole scope, whose whole force, will be cantered in aiding humanity to realize its own true, divine nature.

Offer such a religion and all the nations will follow you. Asoka's council was a council of the Buddhist faith. Akbar's. though more to the purpose. was only a parlour meeting. It was reserved for America to proclaim to all quarters of the globe that the Lord is in every religion.

May He who is the Brahman of the Hindus, the Ahura-Mazda of the Zoroastrians, the Buddha of the Buddhists, the Jehovah of the Jews, the Father in Heaven of the Christians, give strength to you to carry out your noble idea! The star arose in the East; it travelled steadily towards the West, sometimes dimmed and sometimes effulgent, till it made a circuit of the world, and now it is again rising on the very horizon of the East, the borders of the Sanpo(1), a thousand fold more effulgent than it ever was before.

Hail Columbia, motherland of liberty! It has been given to thee, who never dipped her hand in her neighbour’s blood, who never found out that the shortest way of becoming rich was by robbing one's neighbors, it has been given to thee to march at the vanguard of civilization with the flag of harmony.

(1) A Tibetan name for the Bramaputra River

Wunderbar....I was right all along...

There is this theory or theorem which says billionaires are born not made. Well! I can't associate myself to this statement cause I ain't [ not even near ] being a billionaire. But this much I do know and believe.

Of all the subjects we learn in school the one that moulds us into what we are today is Math...be it calculus or even the abacus. Not languages or even sciences. Plain MATH or rather I would like to call it Arithmetic.
I was never good in Math but always believed Math being the missing link in our thinking DNA. A mathematician sees the world in clearer light then others. I would say 90 percent of the worlds inventions and discoveries were by mathematicians.
...e.g. Blaise Pascal, Issac Newton John, Albert Einstein, Max Plunck.

Why do I come up with this? Read the below for you shall know the reason behind the success of billionaires.

"A significant percentage of billionaires have parents with a high aptitude for math. The ability to crunch numbers is crucial to becoming a billionaire, and mathematical prowess is hereditary. Some of the common professions among the parents of Forbes 400 members billionaires were engineers, accountants and small-business owners."

You want to be a billionaire, love Maths.

English...at ease

A Brit drives a German car to an Irish pub and drinks Belgian beer. On the way home picks up Indian curry or a Turkish kebab. Then sits on Swedish furniture and watches American shows on a Japanese TV.

And most of all, being suspicious of anything foreign.

Only in Britain can you get a pizza quicker than an ambulance;
only in Britain do banks leave both doors open, but chain the pens to the counter; only in Britain do supermarkets make sick people walk to the back of the store to get their prescriptions, while healthy people can get their fags at the front.

They might be British, but you can't deny that they're bloody funny.


ONLY THE ENGLISH COULD HAVE INVENTED THIS LANGUAGE

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,
Then shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!

Let's face it - English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England ..
We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes,
we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square,
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend.
If you have a bunch of odds and ends
and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English
should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.

In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
We ship by truck but send cargo by ship.
We have noses that run and feet that smell.
We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.
And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
in which your house can burn up as it burns
down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out,
and in which an alarm goes off by going on.

And, in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop?

I WOULD LIKE TO ADD THAT IF PEOPLE FROM POLAND ARE CALLED POLES THEN

PEOPLE FROM HOLLAND SHOULD BE HOLES AND THE GERMANS GERMS!!!



Wonderful English from Around the World

In a Bangkok temple:
IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN,
EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN.

Cocktail lounge, Norway :
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.

Doctor's office, Rome :
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Dry cleaners, Bangkok :
DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS.

In a Nairobi restaurant:
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.

On the main road to Mombassa, leaving Nairobi:
TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE.

On a poster at Kencom :
ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO WE CAN HELP.

In a City restaurant:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.

In a cemetery:
PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.

Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:
GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.

In a Tokyo bar:
SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.

Hotel, Yugoslavia:
THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

Hotel, Japan :
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.

A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:
IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Hotel, Zurich :
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand :
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?

Airline ticket office, Copenhagen :
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.

A laundry in Rome :
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON