There was a time I moonlighted as a translator in a government organisation. Having no translatory skills what-so-ever, I braved the crowd and landed a job where I was to translator and write speeches for Menteri and Pangarah from Malay to English and vise-verse.
Even before I could solemnly draw out my pen which is suppose to be mightier than sword, I was summoned to the desk of my boss..Ehmm..lady boss.
"Ha Siva...mari...duduk sini," she pointed me to a chair. I sat with a pin drop silence.
"Do you know what you are required to do? You have any idea the nature of your job and responsibility," she asked. I stared at her face like a wall clock.
"Actually...err..hmmm...No idea." She laughed, then took out a file, gave it to me and said, "Go translate this and show me."
I grabbed the Pink-Manila covered file, glazed, stood-up and as I was about to leave, she said, "Don't translate like they do in Hogn Kogn movies...okay."
I believe this is what she meant.
*“I threat you! I challenge you meet me on the roof tonight for a duet!”
*“I will kill you until you are dead from it!”
*“The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?”
*“I got knife scars more than the number of your leg’s hair!”
*“I am damn unsatisfied to be killed in this way.”
*“Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep.”
*“I’ll fire aimlessly if you don’t come out!”
*“You are too useless. And now I must beat you.”
*“Gun wounds again?”
*“A normal person wouldn’t steal pituitaries.”
*“You always use violence. I should’ve ordered glutinous rice chicken.”
*“Take my advice, or I’ll spank you without pants.”
*“Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected.”
*“Who gave you the nerve to get killed here?”
*“Quiet or I’ll blow your throat up.”
*“You daring lousy guy.”
*“Beat him out of recognizable shape!”
*“How can you use my intestines as a gift?”
*“Damn, I’ll burn you into a BBQ chicken!”
*“This will be of fine service for you, you bag of the scum. I am sure you will not mind that I remove your manhoods and leave them out on the dessert flour for your aunts to eat.”
*“Yah-hah, evil spider woman! I have captured you by the short rabbits and can now deliver you violently to your gynecologist for a thorough extermination.”
*“Greetings, large black person. Let us not forget to form a team up together and go into the country to inflict the pain of our karate feets on some of the giant lizard person.”
*Your spear is useless. You better use it for mixing excretory.
*Now I feel flatulent, and you did it.
*My innards have all been disturbed by him.
*That may disarray my intestines.
*I please your uterus. You kiss my toes. It’s fair.
*“This is the Martial Arts Competition, not a place for fighting!” (from Kung Fu)PLEASE TRANSLATE.
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